|Things I have learned from this pain
||[Jul. 28th, 2006|08:18 am]
...just some quick notes about what my shortcoming with xxxx has taught me...|
1. when someone says that they will fall to weakness if you x, than don't do x (even if you are used to doing x with other people in similiar situations and/or you can reason within yourself why x isn't as bad as they think - listen to what this person is telling you and respect their wishes.)
-even when they are joking, there is always some truth in jokes. Be clear and ask about things you are unsure of and consider their words if their response differs from something stated before.
2. Love is built upon the strength and edification of the spirit, not the weakness of the flesh - if things get heavy, take a break now or you will be force to make a clean break later.
3. If you know he is not the one, regardless of what he says, don't stick around waiting for he to become 'the one', he will find you (God will send him) when its time. To have him just 'hanging around' unnecessarily is too tempting.
4. Be a woman of your word (and make sure your word doesn't conflict with God's word and His will for your life) and be a woman of integrity; regardless of what he does, hold to what you know is the correct thing to do.
5. GOD doesn't want you to live in guilt, shame and fear of anything you have done in your past or in fear of anyone. HIS way is one of love, freedom, discipline, faithfulness, brokeness, humility, peace, wisdom, understanding and righteousness. Let that go and walk HIS way. (Because clearily your way doesn't work if you keep falling to the SAME SIN)
6. Let your 'yes' be yes and your 'no' be no. Let your actions reflect what you truly feel and what you truly want. Don't live off of letting people think what they wanna think just because it makes them happy, and all the while you are on a whole different page. That's deceptive and that's not of God.
7. Speak your convictions. If you or someone else is doing/saying something that makes you feel uncomfortable or you think is wrong, SAY SOMETHING. No matter how right they think it is or what status they have (higher or lower than you) you have the right to speak your convictions and to act on your convictions - because in the end you have to explain to GOD why you did what you did.
8. SIMIALIARLY, If you know the right thing to do, do it. Don't let them convince you with their logic why you shouldn't do what you know in your heart is the right thing to do (and sometimes we want people to convince to go against what we know is right, we want them to tell us its ok to do this, its just fine, because then we feel jusitified in doing the thing, because xxxx said its ok; but its not about what they say; its about what GOD says to you and speaks to your heart what is the right thing for you at that time- Listen to HIM.)
9. If you know you are doing something wrong, stop and let that person know and take a break from that person/thing.
10. Do not let loneliness make you desperate or act desperately. You may feel lonely, but you are NEVER alone.
11. When someone tells you something about themseleves, believe that thing and evaluate if you can really be able to deal with someone like that.
12. You can't treat everyone the same; different people need different boundaries, different types of love, different treatment....different people are different. BUT always have a basal standard of the common respect/love you are to give people in certain relationships (associate, friend, sig other, sister, brother....)
13. In order to move on, you gotta let go. No one moves forward to the future by holding onto the anchor of their past.